Mother's Day

So.  Mother's Day.  It was back in May.  I know it.  I am finally getting around to posting about it and that is probably a good thing.  

Around that time I was a little (read: very!) put out about all the sentiment in social media and other places that made it seem as though I shouldn't celebrate Mother's Day because there were women out there who wanted children and couldn't have them.

It is not that I don't feel for those women, because I do.  I have many friends who have dealt with infertility.  I can even claim to be among them after more than a year now of trying to conceive.  

 But there are some who would say that I am insensitive and unfeeling and rude.  I am sure they are the same people who tell me that I need more "tolerance" in other areas of major current social concern.

But I really didn't (and don't) feel that all of that means I can't celebrate the wonderful aspects of my life and my very nature that make me a mother.

So, by the time Mother's Day came around I was in an ornery mood about the whole thing.  (My day was wonderful and highlighted by my wonderful children and a loving husband who gave me the "day off," letting me nap, making dinner and even a yummy requested dessert.) 

I had planned my whole Mother's Day post and it was a blistering diatribe meant to give vent to all those roiling emotions and thoughts. (Sorry, seems you are getting part of it anyway!)     

I went to church on Mother's Day and was so enriched, edified and calmed down by one of the talks that was shared.  I loved it so much I asked her to email me a copy.  

I loved her message about why we should celebrate Mother's Day and how it really does apply to all women.  We all have cause to celebrate.  And we should not be divided by the "haves" and "have nots" (children in this case) in our efforts to preserve and protect the family! 

I hope that her message resonates with you as it did with me.  I was able to really enjoy the rest of Mother's Day because her talk calmed my riled emotions and motivated my spirit.

It is my privilege to address you today and I do so with some trepidation.  I realize that today is a wonderful day for most, but also a day of tenderness for others.  I hope and pray that the Spirit will be with us today as I proceed.

In THE FAMILY – A PROCLAMATION TO THE WORLD it states:  We, the First Presidency and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

All human beings-male and female-are created in the image of God.

Male and female.  That is what we are.  It does not say:  Male, female and mother.  All women (and men) have the potential for parenthood.  There is no other way (no matter what scientists might attempt).  Let me quote from Patricia T. Holland, former counselor in the General Relief Society Presidency:

“Eve was given the identity of ‘the mother of all living’…before she ever bore a child.  It would appear that her motherhood preceded her maternity, just as surely as the perfection of the Garden preceded the struggles of mortality.  I believe mother is one of those very carefully chosen words, one of those rich words—with meaning after meaning after meaning.  We must not, at all costs, let that word divide us.  I believe with all of my heart that it is first and foremost a statement about nature, not a head count of our children.”

I testify that what Sister Holland says is true.  It is what I feel and believe – she stated it better than I ever could. 

This past General Conference during a talk by Elder M. Russell Ballard, he made a statement that has haunted me.  He quoted from a New York Times report that stated that the share of children born to unmarried women has crossed a threshold:  more than half of births to American women under 30 occur outside marriage.

Again I quote from the Proclamation:

“The family is ordained of God.  Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan.  Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity.

…we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.”

I would add that a warning from Prophets, Seers and Revelators is something that is serious and is ignored at our own peril.

Returning to Elder Ballard’s talk he goes on to explain about cause and effect.  Are families stronger because they are educated and prosperous or are people more educated and prosperous because they have values and strong families?  He testifies that it is the latter:

“When people make family and religious commitments to gospel principles, they begin to do better spiritually and often temporally as well.”

I wonder if in these “modern” times we get confused about what educated and prosperous really mean?  I was raised in a Christian (though not LDS) home.  I would consider my parents educated, yet neither attended college.  Both were smarter than me and as I age I continue to realize just how much more intelligent they were!  My father was a carpenter.  He worked hard, but work was seasonal, so I know they struggled financially.  However, we always had food, well prepared and plenty to go around.  We always had clothes to wear, clean and well-tended, not always the latest fashion, but presentable for sure.  Our home was modest, but warm, dry and kept that way by the hard work of my parents.

We were not rich by today’s standards…but what more could I have asked for?  I was loved and cared for.  My physical needs were met.  I was taught correct principles and values, by parents who lived them. 

At age 18 I broke my parents hearts and left their church and joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  Before she died, my mother talked about her life.  She didn’t come out and say it, but I think even after 30 years in the Church she still felt my rejection of her beliefs and felt like she had failed in some way, though she couldn’t think how.  I hope that now that they are both beyond the veil, my parents can see that through their teachings and example, they prepared me to accept the greatest blessing in my life; my membership in the true Church of God.  I have been able to raise my own children within the covenant blessings of the gospel of Jesus Christ. 

There are not letters after my name.  No college degrees on my wall.  Yet I feel that I am educated and have taught my children the best I could.  We struggled financially also, as for most of my children’s young lives; we were a single income family.  We also sacrificed much-just ask my kids!  However, none went hungry.  We always had a roof over our heads.  The furniture wasn’t always new, but it was adequate for our needs.  We had all we needed and even much of what we wanted.

Prosperity is often thought of as another word for rich.   A wise man once said:  a rich person is he who has enough.  In that definition I think most of us could consider ourselves prosperous.  I know that as we keep our covenants and do our best to live our lives and raise our children in righteousness, we will be blessed temporally as well as spiritually.

Going back to Elder Ballard’s talk he goes on to declare:

“Brothers and sisters, the most important cause of our lifetime is our families.  If we will devote ourselves to this cause, we will improve every other aspect of our lives and will become, as a people and as a church, an example and a beacon for all peoples of the earth.

…The Church is a mooring in this tempestuous sea, an anchor in the churning waters of change and division, and a beacon to those who value and seek righteousness.  The Lord uses this Church as a tool in pulling His children throughout the world toward the protection of His gospel.”

We live in tumultuous times.  The Latter-Days.  Great are the struggles we face.  The adversary is throwing all he has in his arsenal against us.  This is his last great chance, and he isn’t wasting it.  Are we prepared to fight—not just a battle—but a war?         For our very souls and the souls of our posterity are at stake.  This can be overwhelming and even frightening, but know this (I quote from Boyd K. Packer):

“As the world grows ever more threatening, the powers of heaven draw ever closer to families and parents.”

We are not alone.  We are doing God’s work.  He does not leave us to fight this war alone.  Doctrine and Covenants 35: 13-14 states:

“Wherefore, I call upon the weak things of the world, those who are unlearned and despised, to thrash the nations by the power of my Spirit;

 And their arm shall be my arm, and I will be their shield and their buckler; and I will gird up their loins, and they shall fight manfully for me; and their enemies shall be under their feet; and I will let fall the sword in their behalf, and by the fire of mine indignation will I preserve them.”

Another way that the powers of heaven draw closer is through our prophets.  They give us divine guidance and direction in this war we face.

In 1979 President Spencer W. Kimball made this statement:  “Much of the major growth that is coming to the Church in the last days…will happen to the degree that the women of the Church reflect righteousness and articulateness in their lives and to the degree that [they] are seen as distinct and different—in happy ways—from the women of the world” 

Think about it.  In 1979 President Kimball saw us and talked about us!!!  We are the sisters he prophesied about!  It is up to us to make his prophecy a reality!

In Doctrine and Covenants 25:10, the Lord counseled Emma Smith to “lay aside the things of this world, and seek for the things of a better”

In John 16:33, Christ declared “I have overcome the world”

The only way that we may overcome the world is by coming unto Christ.  That means walking away from the world.

“If you expect glory, intelligence and endless lives,” said President Joseph F. Smith, “let the world go”

We are not women of the world.  We are women of God.  And women of God will be among the greatest heroines of the 21st century.  As President Joseph F. Smith proclaimed, it is not for us “to be led by the women of the world; it is for [us] to lead…the women of the world, in everything that is praise-worthy”

Sister Sheri L. Dew shared this:

As sisters in Zion we can be obstacles to the adversary’s conspiracy against families and virtue.  No wonder he tempts us to settle for earthly pleasures rather than to seek for eternal glory.  A 45-year-old mother of six told me recently that when she stopped poring over magazines that plagued her with images of how her home and wardrobe should look, she began to feel more at peace.  She said, “I may be chubby, gray, and wrinkled, but I am a chubby, gray, wrinkled daughter of God, who knows me and loves me.”

From Sister Margaret D. Nadauld Young Women General President in Oct. 2000:

Women of God can never be like women of the world.  The world has enough women who are tough; we need women who are tender.  There are enough women who are coarse; we need women who are kind.  There are enough women who are rude; we need women who are refined.  We have enough women of fame and fortune; we need more women of faith.  We have enough greed; we need more goodness.  We have enough vanity; we need more virtue.  We have enough popularity; we need more purity.

May [women] understand their own great capacity for strength in the timeless virtues that some would scoff at in a modern, liberated world for women.”

Sisters I am grateful to you and those that have gone before who have exemplified to me my role as a daughter of God in these latter-days.  You have taught me through your love, patience, example and friendship.

I am grateful to the Brethren also.  I thank you for your kindness, your willingness to serve your Heavenly Father by serving his children.  As you love and care for your wives and children, and magnify your callings in a righteous manner, you show us the example of the Savior through your actions.

I know the gospel of Jesus Christ has been restored to the earth through the Prophet Joseph Smith.  I know that the Book of Mormon is the word of God and will lead us to salvation and exaltation as we read and follow its teachings.  I know that God lives.  I know that Jesus Christ is his Son and our Redeemer.  He willingly sacrificed himself so that we all may return to our Heavenly Father’s presence with glory and honor.

I wish to close with this quote from Elder Neal A. Maxwell:

“When the real history of mankind is fully disclosed, will it feature the echoes of gunfire or the shaping sound of lullabies?  The great armistices made by military men or the peacemaking of women in homes and in neighborhoods?  Will what happened in cradles and kitchens prove to be more controlling than what happened in congresses?”

In the name of Jesus Christ.  Amen